Postcards From Across the Pond

Our inaugural holiday for 2026. Eight days, and I seemed to have a lot to say about every one of them. I plan to post two days at a time over the next week or so to get it all out of the way, then I’ll return to my usual sporadic schedule so you’re not so overwhelmed.

Day Three – Wednesday, 13 May 2026 SUN

Ljubljana

Today the group’s missing suitcases are supposed to join us, but that won’t be until this evening. Until then, we are touring the city of Ljubljana (lub e AH na). We were supposed to visit the caves today, but our Fearless Leader (FL for short*) wisely thought it would be a shame to spend the only sunny day we are likely to have on this holiday underground. It’s still cold, but at least it’s not raining. The rain is due to start again tomorrow.

Slovenia is one of the smallest countries in Europe** (FL tells us it’s the smallest; but Montenegro, Luxemburg, Monte Carlo?), however, for its size, it does a stonkin’ traffic jam. The trip from our hotel to Ljubljana is supposed to take thirty minutes, but we were lucky to do it in an hour. No bother. Someone else is doing the driving; that’s why we like trips like this.

Slovenia is also a very green, very clean country, and has an admittedly difficult language. According to FL, it is the greenest country in the EU, the cleanest country in Europe and has the most difficult language in the world. These are a lot of superlatives (the most superlatives in the northern hemisphere, I suspect) but she is clearly, and justifiably, proud of her country.

The green bit is self-evident, as is the cleanliness superlative. The country could not be any cleaner. My wife and I, in our strolls around the lake or walks along the streets and lanes, saw not a single bit of litter. I kid you not. They are taught at an early age to properly dispose of trash, and to recycle, and the results speak for themselves. We could all learn something from the Slovenians.

And I don’t doubt FL’s final claim about their language. When we first arrived, my wife asked how she could say “Thank you” in the native language and came out of that exchange having decided to just speak English. Then, on a lengthy bus trip, FL gave a short primer on the Slovenian language, telling us the term for “me,” then going on to explain there is a different term for “me and her,” “me and him,” “me and other women,” “me and a mixed group of other people,” and by then we got the point. Fortunately, everyone also speaks English. They learn it in school along with their own language, German, French, and whatever other languages they care to speak.

After reaching Ljubljana we were decanted and given a tour of the town centre. There is a lot of history here, so I’ll give the Cliff Notes version. Slovenia is a tiny portion of the country people my age think of as Yugoslavia. Prior to that, the region belonged to the Hapsburg Empire, the Holy Roman Empire, and was part of the Roman Empire (Italy is right next door). Slovenia, as it is today, only came into being in 1991 making it “the youngest country …” You get the gist, but it certainly isn’t very old.

After touring the town centre, we were released. My wife and I, and pretty much everyone else in the group, headed for the funicular railway to ride up to the castle for the view and some light refreshment.

Having done that, we only had enough time for a quick nose around before returning to the rendezvous point.

Back in Bled, we decided to take advantage of the sunny day and mild weather to wander the shoreline of Lake Bled. I can see why so many people come here, it is achingly beautiful.

After that, we waited for my suitcase.

It was originally due in late afternoon, but there was a delay. And once it got to the airport, they had to arrange for someone to bring it—along with all the other missing cases—to the hotel. This caused a lot of anxiety, and speculation on what we would do if it never arrived. It was too late to go shopping so we’d need to do some laundry in the bathroom sink and hope it would dry overnight. But then we got a text that the bags had arrived and were at reception.

By the time I got there, several happy group members were already wheeling their cases away. I found mine and was signing the forms when one of our group arrived and noticed his wife’s bag was not among them. Coincidentally, this was the husband of the couple we had sat with at dinner, and they were desperate to get their case because the wife had no clothes and, as with myself, it was too late to go buy more. The van driver was sympathetic but informed the man that these were the only cases he had been given and his was not among them.

“You can tell my wife, then,” the man said.

(How they coped I do not know, but their case arrived the following evening so it’s all over but the shouting and the emails and the forms and the demands for compensation and the purchasing of Suitcase Trackers—which I had not previously known existed—and the bad reviews on Trip Advisor.)

I hasten to emphasise that this was NOT the fault of our Tour Organizer. I don’t generally name names and, despite the shortcomings, I am not going to reveal the name of the hotel as they are just trying to squeeze out an existence in a highly competitive environment. The tour operator, who is doing a stand-out job is Travelsphere; the cockwombles who lost our cases is British Airways, and I will name them because they are cockwombles, not simply because they lost our cases, but because they didn’t display any urgency about getting them back to us and, in this guy’s case, blatantly lied to him about where, why and how they were rectifying their error. Cockwombles.

* That’s not what we call her; it’s just my abbreviation so I don’t have to keep typing Fearless Leader.

** Slovenia is the size of Wales and has fewer people (2 million to 3.2 in Wales) and it is doing quite well for itself, proof that the size of a country does not dictate its confidence or competence, which should give a boost to Annibyniaeth i Gymru (the Welsh Independence Party for you non-Welsh speakers).

Day Four – Thursday,14 May 2026 RAIN

Underground

As promised, the rain returned, a steady drizzle interspersed with heavy downpours and chilly breezes. Due to the world-class traffic jams, we left early—twenty-five from our group of twenty-seven—for an optional excursion to Predjama Castle and Postojna Cave.

Predjama Castle is the largest Cave-Castle in existence, though FL tempered that superlative by revealing there are not that many Cave-Castles, so the bar was set pretty low. (She also, during one of her talks, noted that Slovenia is the only country in the world with the word LOVE in its name, though I suspect not many countries were vying for that accolade.)

Superlative-laced as it was, the castle was astounding. Part castle, part cave, part labyrinth, it was a masterpiece of medieval engineering and just about the safest place you could imagine. It was also dark, dank, and cold but, as FL noted, safety trumped comfort during the Middle Ages.

The castle came into its own when its most famous resident—Erasmus of Luegg, the local Robin Hood, robbing from the gentry but probably keeping the booty for himself—was under siege for a full year and a day. The army occupying his front garden thought to wait him out, assuming Erasmus would need to pop out for milk or Corn Flakes at some point, but they were unaware that the cave had a secret exit in the back and Erasmus was continually receiving supplies.

The end came when the army bribed a servant who revealed the location of the most vulnerable portion of the castle—the lavatory. When Erasmus was on the throne, the turncoat servant lit a candle in a window as a signal and they fired a cannon into the loo, giving Erasmus the Tywin Lanister treatment (for you GoT fans) and, one must suppose, requiring the services of local plumbers and plasterers to remedy the damage.

We then took the short trip to the Postojna Cave complex, which itself is impressive. It sports a massive hotel (with some to-die-for views), a raft of restaurants, a clutch of tat shops and, of course, the entrance to the cave. As there is nothing to do in the area aside from visiting the cave and the castle, I expect most stays in the hotel are short-term.

The cave is, according to FL, the longest continuous karst cave system in … I don’t know, let’s just start saying “in the Universe” and leave it at that. Actually, it’s just Slovenia, and it comes with a caveat. A longer karst cave system (me neither) has recently been discovered in Slovenia but, as it is not yet open to the public, Postojna Cave now claims the title of The Longest, Continuous, Publicly Open Karst Cave System in the Universe (Slovenia). At 15.12 miles in length, it falls only 410.88 miles short of the World Record, currently held by the aptly named Mammoth Cave in Kentucky.

The cave, however, does hold the World Record for the first cave railway system, which was opened in 1872. Early on, it wasn’t much of a railway as the cars were propelled by the guides themselves. Only later, at the beginning of the 20th century, were gas locomotives introduced, and electric engines arrived in 1945.

Its diminutive size on the world stage does not detract from its popularity. Millions of people have visited it, and the crowds, even in the off-season, are massive. The tour begins with a 3.5 km train ride that provides many fine views of the cave’s wonders without making you expend any energy. If you choose, you can disembark from the train at its furthest point and take the 1.5 km tour, on foot, with a guide.

The tour is spectacular and well organised, but caves can be like castles: once you’ve seen one, you’ve pretty much seen them all, and after a while—despite spectacular chambers, massive stalactites, impressive stalagmites and amazing columns—I was caved out. And the final bit was more like a route-march simply so they could prove it was the longest continuous cave system in the universe.

Despite that, it was well worth the effort and, as a bonus, while we were under ground, we weren’t being rained on.

I’m back on the bus now, and the hour-long ride in the AM that took an hour and a half is beginning to look like it will take even longer on the return trip because we are currently at a standstill in the largest traffic jam in the universe.