Taps

Twelve years ago, when I first moved into this flat, one of the first things I did was put up a flag.
I did this because I have always had a flag flying from any home I have lived in. I’m an American; it’s what we do. To be fair, I did know that I was going against the rules of my tenancy agreement, which stated that nothing was to be put on the balcony, but I didn’t think anyone would mind. I also didn\’t think that I would be violating an actual law. Not the bludgeoning to death of the delivery man and hiding his body in the coal cellar type of violation; more like the allowing your dog to poop on your neighbor’s yard sort. But a violation nonetheless.
However, the flag stayed up, no one complained, no kittens were killed and life went on as before.

Long may she wave

Because I had just come from America, it did strike me as odd that no one else was flying flags, but I soon came to understand that overt displays of patriotism were deemed by the locals as being a bit gauche and over-the-top, something an American might do. What I did not know was that, in order to fly a flag, you had to secure permission from the local council. The fees for the red tape to acquire this permission could cost hundreds of pounds and permission was not always forthcoming. Many councils, it seems, simply did not allow it. I think most British people didn’t know this, either, but since they rarely flew flags, it never became an issue. Until the summer of 2012.

That was the summer of the Queen’s Diamond Jubilee Celebrations and the London Olympics and, suddenly, everyone was patriotic and, without realizing they were breaking the law, everyone put up flags.

A bit over-the-top, don\’t you think?

The local councils, who make a point of knowing these things, did realize it was against the law and soon found themselves faced with the onerous (not to mention unpopular) task of having to put almost every citizen in the entire country in jail.

Then something truly amazing (and, as far as I know, unheard of in the annals of government) occurred: common sense prevailed. The national government, realizing they were sitting on a potentially embarrassing issue, quickly passed a law giving everyone and anyone the right to fly a flag.
However, if you happened to be living in a building you didn’t own—say, a rented flat, for instance—you had to have the landlord’s permission. And I did not. But, again, no one complained, no baby harp seals were clubbed with cricket bats and life went on as before.
Then yesterday this letter arrived:
“We [the landlord] have received several complaints with regard to some residence (sic) of Pelham and Waverley consuming illegal substances in their flats and within the communal grounds.

The above will not be tolerated and further to this letter anyone suspected of doing so will be reported to the Police and also have their tenancy terminated without further discussion.

I would also like to take this opportunity to advise residents that Flags are not to be displayed on the balconies or in windows within the development.”
So, in addition to having to dismantle the meth lab in the back bedroom and uproot all the marijuana plants I was growing in the loft, I had to take the flag down.
(Note to local police officers: the above was a joke—I do not have any illegal substances in my flat so please put down the battering ram and call off the drug-sniffing dogs.)
I admit to being more than a little disappointed. In the grand scheme of things, hanging a flag seems relatively innocuous when compared to drug trafficking, and the off-handed nature of the flag codicil appears to me like someone told the guy writing the letter, “and while you’re at it, make that asshole take his damn flag down!”
Oddly, my neighbors seem more upset about me having to take down my flag than I do. One of them even came to my door to give me a pamphlet that spelled out my right to fly the flag (conveniently omitting the part about needing the property owner’s permission). I’m touched by this but, there is little any of us can do.
So the flag came down and will likely stay down. For the first time in my life I am living in a place where I am forbidden to fly the nation’s flag. An era has ended, but no one was hurt, no puppies were abandoned and life will go on as before.
I just wish someone had been around to play taps.

Day is done…gone the sun…