Heatwave
It’s like a heat wave, burning in my heart.
I can’t keep from crying. It’s tearing me apart
Martha Reeves & The Vandellas
We have just returned from Northumberland, where—for a few days—it was blessedly cool. After that, it went into the 80s, and on the ride home, I noticed, just as we were reaching London, that the car’s thermometer read 95 degrees, or 35 C. While I expect the motorway was a bit hotter than the surrounding countryside, that’s still hot, no matter if you figure it in Fahrenheit or Celsius.
Please note: for the remainder of this post, Fahrenheit will be used exclusively for several reasons:
1) after 25 years in the UK, I still have not got my head around Celsius, so I have given up trying
2) many of my readers are American, and don’t’ know what Celsius is
3) Brits all know that 95 degrees means Fahrenheit and not 95 degrees Celsius—which would be 203 F—so the distinction is not needed and gives credence to my belief that they all secretly wish to convert back to Imperial measurements.
Serendipitously, while preparing to write this post, I ran across an article I wrote back in 2011 which made note of another heat wave. It’s hard to believe that a mere fifteen years ago, a temperature over 76 degrees was newsworthy, but that two-day stretch (yes, two days) of abnormally hot weather was headline news back then.
I mention in that article, that a British summer usually consists of three hot days and a lot of drizzle. I, therefore, expected another hot day at some point in the future followed by the advent of autumn. I’ve no idea if that happened, or what transpired since then, I only know where we are now: in the middle of the third heat wave this summer. And it’s only July.
In late May, we had a week in the high 80s. We endured, and prayed for cooler weather to return, and it did. But then, in mid-June, the temperatures suddenly shot up to 95 before cooling down to the soothing low 80s. During that week, events were cancelled, schools were closed, plans were rescheduled, people were warned to stay inside, and we attempted to buy a fan.
While coming to terms with the fact that there is not a fan to be had anywhere in Great Britain (and possibly the EU), a third heat wave hit, running from early July to NOW! Again, with temps in the 90s.
Now, I’m from upstate New York, a place described by at least one relocation website as having a harsh climate. I’ve endured consecutive days of minus 22 degrees in winter (Gosh, I hope they don’t import that to the UK) and weeks of triple degree heat in summer. But our climate has always been like that, so we plan for it, we work around it, we adapt to it. In Britain, the main problem facing inhabitants for the past millennia has been how to keep warm.
With its famously cold and dreary environment, dwellings and businesses are constructed to retain heat. Air conditioning is not a thing, and backyard pools are rare. So, when a heat wave hits, our homes provide no refuge; it’s hot inside and outside and there is no way to escape it except go to Sainsbury’s and stand in the freezer aisle.
Speaking of, that’s not possible here (air conditioning, that is, not standing in the freezer aisle). When I finally broke down and bought an air conditioner in the States, it was a bog-standard, boxy thing. You opened a window, stuck the hot end outside, the cool end inside, and Bob’s your uncle. That doesn’t fly here as there is no way to put anything in our windows. The best you can do is get a self-contained unit to cool a single room. From what I hear, they aren’t very efficient, they require constant emptying, they are expensive, and, like fans, they are currently out of stock.
While businesses and shops are beginning to feature air conditioning, installing it in private homes is practically unheard of. To put a cooling system into a house, you need a shedload of money and, most importantly, a house, which we—and many, many others—do not have. We live in a flat, in a block of flats, and no one is going to retrofit air conditioning into a block of flats.
The only option open to us is to go to the Co-Op store around the corner, stand in the freezer aisle and look forward to the day—perhaps sometime in mid-February—when fans go back on sale.
BOOKS! BOOKS! BOOKS!
FREE! FREE! FREE!
In case you never look at the What’s New item in the sidebar (and my guess is you don’t) I have a lot of books to shift.
I had them with a local shop that sold self-published books, but the owner is going in a different direction so all the books came back to me and they are taking up valuable space on my desk. Have a look at the sidebar or my book page (don’t forget The Talisman series) and if you see anything you think you might be interested in (or have need of a door stop or a table-leveller), send me an email (it’s on the Contact page) with your address and I’ll send you a signed copy of the book(s) of your choice.
I, and my desk, will thank you.
Offer good until surplus books are gone. Not valid with any other offer. Satisfaction with storyline, characterisation, or subject matter is not guaranteed. All transactions final. If you take a book, you keep it; no backsies.